Comments others make

Emotional eating is bad and like I have mentioned before I'm bad about doing it...especially when I am experiencing extremes. I remember growing up and having family members call or write and the thing they would ask about after the usual "How are you doing?" was about my weight loss or lack thereof. I doubt it was intentional and came from a concern for my health, but it would always spiral me into a depression. No teenage girl needs to constantly be reminded that she isn't measuring up. I had enough pressure coming from my mom and peers at school. I never heard family call mom and immediately ask how giving up cigarettes was going.

There is a story I would like to share, because, well, it still haunts me to this day. The pressure that I was under as a kid and living with the consequences of everyone's disapproval, but had no control over the circumstances.

My parents divorced when I was VERY young. Once my dad moved out of state I could count on one hand how often he visited. On one particular visit he was hanging around the house and went out back to lounge. I wanted to be close to him and talk (like any kid would). He proceeded to light a joint. I was a kid and although I knew what he was doing was wrong, ignored it and stayed outside. (He wasn't so bad to offer any to me...so you can calm down). I smelled the marijuana smoke and began to get hungry. I did what any other person would do and snacked...a lot appearently. I didn't know being around that would cause "the munchies" but it did. When he got to my grandma's house, he told her about how all I did was eat when he was there. After his visit she called my mom and said I needed to get some control. I was devastated. I couldn't tell anyone about his smoking weed around me or I might never see him again. I was heartbroken when I found out he didn't bother to see me when he was in the area one time later on. It felt like I couldn't do anything right.

I learned how to control myself a little more in college when I was able to distance myself from family that unintentionally sabotage any success I may have had. Now I have children that say things every once in a while about my weight and I try to let it slide off my back and that is much easier to accept than when an adult mentions something. Kids don't know any better, adults do.